Hi. apa khabar?

Welcome to my blog. I hope you'll find something that you can relate to. Who knows, there could be other souls out there who think a little too much and feel a little too deeply, just like me. 

Searching for happiness

Happiness... so many seek it and yet so many are lost in the process. I'm no Dalai Lama but I don't think the key to happiness is much of a secret. If it is, well here's a couple of mine:

Contentment.

Being content stems from gratitude. You can't be happy if you're not grateful with all that you've and don't have. Yes, that means looking in the mirror and despite the zits or uneven skin tone you tell yourself 'Meh, those zits can go to hell' and walk out the room smiling from ear to ear. 
It means opening the fridge and eating what you DO have instead of complaining. It means staining your favourite shirt but getting over it because a) you can wash it b) you've plenty of other shirts c) it's just a damn shirt

I think the key to contentment is to stop wanting. We don't always get what we want in life and it can be frustrating. Oh, yes. It's frustrating when you're not top of the class, when people disappoint you, when you still can't afford the latest gadget despite working your butt off.

But the less you want; the more that life will pleasantly surprise you. If you're still breathing and able to use all your five senses then by all means, enjoy what life can offer you.

No expectations.

LET GO OF THEM. Don't expect a pot of gold to appear on your doorstep or for your boss to hand you that raise the next day. Be realistic. Let go of those monumental goals like lets say... never getting a B/C in an exam, learning 5 languages or being a millionaire by 25. 

I'm not discouraging anyone from setting goals in life but sometimes in the race to success, we tend to set ourselves goals that we don't necessarily need to achieve to be happy. Setting huge goals can put unnecessary stress on you.

Back in school, I used to want to outdo the smartest person in class or just be better in everything but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't. And that's OK because in the end we all have our own talents that the person next to you might not possess. 

We often fool ourselves into thinking once we achieve a certain goal we'll be happy forever. Yes, you'll feel awesome but that feeling will eventually fade. Then, what next? Another goal? Then, what? 

Make no comparisons.

I remember back in my teen years, I bought plenty of those 'SO... you're a teenager. Here's what to do' kind of books and one thing all those books preached was to be YOURSELF. I never learnt that lesson until a year ago. Better late than never, ey?

You are ultimately yourself. No one can be you and despite how hard you try, you can't be the next Richard Branson or Giselle Bünchen but why is that so bad? Sometimes the best way to compete with others in any field, is to just better YOURSELF every day.

And that doesn't mean you've to model yourself after someone crazily amazing. We always seem to admire people for their success but it's important to acknowledge their downfalls, too. Wealth and success don't make a person; it's how they handled themselves during failure that defines them as a person. That's when you really see their true colours. Their strength.

How we perceive people is essentially how they let us perceive them. In the end, we're all human. Not every day is a good day and not even the wealthiest of people can escape problems. 

Self-pity is sickening.

Do not ever pity yourself. Do not loathe yourself. Do NOT think lowly of yourself. Nothing is more unattractive and irritating to others than a person who can't appreciate their own strengths. 

For others to love you, you need to love yourself first! If you can't find things to love about yourself, what makes you think others will? You should never feel inferior to others even if you think they're better than you.

When it comes to your weaknesses: work on it. Don't just mope about; DO SOMETHING. Get help and support from either your friends or someone who can give professional advice. You'll be surprised with how much people are willing to help you out.

Be happy for others.
Yes, even those you dislike. Envy or hatred are emotions that harvest unhappiness. I know how it feels to feel that certain people are undeserving of their luck but even success can be the downfall of certain people.

When you're not happy for others, you just become a bitter person. You become insincere in your words and insatiable. How can anything possibly make you happy if at the end of the day, even if life were to give you everything; you still want what person A has?

It's not tomorrow or later. It's
Happiness isn't a goal nor a destination. It's a process. It's in the small things that you do everyday. It's being able to rest after a long day of work, it's a refreshing shower after a long run, it's the smell of newly washed clothes, it's the inside jokes between friends.

Happiness isn't found in one massive achievement but in a thousand of tiny things you overlook.
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That's all folks. I'm not claiming I'm a happiness guru but I just feel that people tend to burden themselves with such negativity when they can choose to be happy. I don't expect everyone to be able to relate to any of these but that's how I keep myself happy and unfazed when life gets a little too hard to bear.

Oh, and I'd like to wish my Christian friends and readers a very merry Christmas. God bless. :)

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